Ignotum per Ignotius
by AmethystGleam
Summary: [Xenosaga] (Spoilers for end of Episode II, shounen-ai warning) The aura of mystery surrounding chaos bothers Canaan, and he decides to do something about it; it's just not easy when everything seems to be going awry.
1. My Former Navigator

**Ignotum per Ignotius  
**(A thing unknown by a thing more unknown)

A fanfic by AmethystGleam

* * *

Disclaimer: I don't own Xenosaga or its characters. 

Author's Rant: I'll try to keep it brief. ; Consider this your _shounen-ai_ warning. Shounen-ai means two boys like each other. If you're upset by such relationships, please refrain from reading this fanfiction. I apologize in advance, also, for any OOC-ness or Incorrect Data—this is simply a work of fiction, and as such, I'd like you, the reader, to keep an open mind about yourself.

Finally, this fic contains _spoilers_ in relation to Xenosaga: Episode II's ending. If you have not yet completed the game and don't want to risk getting the game spoiled for you (though I was never effected by such things; chances are you won't know what I'm talking about, and hence can't be spoiled), then don't read it. Simple as that.

This concludes my rant for this chapter. Please enjoy.

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_Introduction: A long time ago_

It's the lack of data that bothers me.

14 years ago, I was sent to what is now known as 'Old Miltia,' on a top-secret mission to recover the U.R.T.V.s. While I had insisted upon my ability to complete the mission alone, I was assigned a navigator – and therein the problem began.

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_Chapter 1: My Former Navigator_

I never understood chaos. The moment I met him, I thought him no different from any other human, besides the exotic mix of tanned skin, platinum hair, and pair of blue-green eyes that seemed to glow with otherworldly light. The young man's outwards demeanor was polite and good-natured, but beyond that façade, I could tell from the start that he had a lot to hide; and I was right about that. I didn't particularly care about it at the time, but chaos divulged very little about himself during the mission on Old Miltia besides a few enigmatic comments that certainly led me to disbelieve that he was at all a normal human being.

At the time, I was satisfied in that I did not have to make small talk with him, and despite his aforementioned demeanor, my navigator had been rather professional in his work, once I calmed him down enough for him to perform it. I was able to pass off the curious skills and comments of chaos with the thought that I would never see him again after our mission on Old Miltia; however, 14 years later, we met again, the two of us looking exactly as we had 14 years before. chaos was definitely not a normal human. After being informed that I was to be stationed on the Elsa with chaos and the others, my interest in the man began to pique again, and I looked up chaos's file in the U.M.N. database.

Never, in all my years of service, had I seen such an empty file on someone so deeply involved in the sorts of things chaos is. His first name, his weight, his gender, and his height; This was all the information about him that there was on file. No last name, date of birth, place of birth, or race. In the footnotes of the page, his occupation aboard the Elsa was noted in small print, but nothing further.

Was chaos really this much of a mystery to everyone? Or was there someone in the U.M.N. hiding his information even from military personnel? I couldn't figure it out. Furthermore, I failed to understand how anyone could trust, or rely on, someone they knew so little about. After accessing chaos's file, I had begun to pay more attention to those around my former navigator. None of them ever asked questions. chaos would disappear for a moment, or say something extremely out-of-place, but no one would ever question him.

I am an emotionally repressed Realian. So it must be the lack of data that bothers me.

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Author's Conclusion: The first two chapters go mildly slow, but it picks up after that. Reviews are always welcome, but please direct flames directly to my email, which can be found in my profile. Notes: This fic was originally posted on a few days ago, but finding extreme lack of Xenosaga fandom in that direction, I decided to come here. I'm nervous to have my fic on display amongst so many of you who write so much better than I do. ; I hope you all can receive this fic in good tastes with the good intentions with hence I have written it. 


	2. Chasing chaos

**Ignotum per Ignotius**  
(A thing unknown by a thing more unknown)

A fanfic by AmethystGleam

* * *

Disclaimer: I don't own Xenosaga or its characters. 

Author's Rant: Do heed the _shounen-ai_ and _spoiler_ warnings from the 1st chapter. This is still the same fic. Rules still apply.

Please enjoy.

* * *

_Chapter 2: Chasing chaos_

It's been several months since I looked unto the U.M.N. database for information on chaos, and after coming to terms with the fact that his comrades would never question his abilities, I decided to take matters into my own hands, observing chaos on my own, whenever I had the chance.

At first, I had come to_ seemingly_ ignore his presence, but that process soon became difficult. chaos began to come and talk with me a little, every time he was on the bridge. I'd often tell him to stop worrying and go do whatever it was that he was supposed to be doing at the time, and he would shoot me one of his blind, false smiles; a smile that I couldn't help but notice looked constantly disturbed. Irregardless, just as it had been 14 years ago, he seemed to accept my words and calm down a little.

Despite my discreet surveillance, chaos still disappeared on occasion, and the chance to gain information about him slipped through my fingers time and time again. At one point, I came to wonder if chaos, himself, even knew who and what he is. Nevertheless, my search for data turned over in vain each time I tried, and just as I had begun to reflect on why I was so curious about this young man in the first place, when such levels of concern and discomfort this high, should've been, in all due logic, suppressed by my emotional inhibitor drive; I was distracted by a particularly fascinating situation.

It had been to my understanding that the U.R.T.V. unit, designation Rubedo, had gone off to fight U.R.T.V. unit, designation Albedo, and the corresponding U-DO variation. The former of the U.R.T.V.'s had run off in the E.S. Asher, and no more than an hour later, returned in chaos's company. After an extreme 'welcome back' for the smaller of the two, chaos gave his same fake smile and descended down the elevator. I had been resting there at the bottom, leaning against the wall, as he turned that same smile on me, before heading off towards the residential area on his own. Suspicious, I followed him, staying back, but still close enough to track his winding movements from hallway to hallway, until he finally paused at an empty corridor.

3 seconds later, I peered around the corner, into that corridor, and found it bare. The only exits from the corridor had been to backtrack to where I now stood, or to go through the door at the end of the hall, which was firmly shut. Had he used the door, I would have heard it open, and seen it close, but the amount of seconds that correlate between his disappearance and the doors timing signaled a 0.0002 chance of my former navigator being able to use the door without me noticing. Thus, chaos had vanished, and inexplicably so.

Having failed my mission yet again, I headed for the park area of the Durandal, in search of a quiet place to resume deliberation of my earlier thoughts. A bit of frustration slipped through my suppressor, and I glared at no one in particular.

Again left to ponder the possibility of malfunction in my emotional suppressant, my thoughts were soon interrupted by a sudden and violent wave that shook the ship. I watched, impassively, through the park's window, as an immense structure appeared, larger than anything I'd ever seen before. My eyes were glued to the immense mass as it took the Zohar from Old Miltia into itself, and before I could make any sense of the thing's action, I spotted a familiar platinum-haired young man, hovering just outside the window.

It was clear from his position and decent, that he had been standing on top of the ship, and had just dropped, his back to the window. Alarm overcame me, and I barely had time to curse my obviously over-malfunctioning emotional suppressant," chaos!"

My systems snapped back to normal, suddenly, upon the realization that even if there wasn't so much glass between me and the outside, the lack of air in space would prevent my voice from carrying as it was. My face set back into its normal, emotionless, expression, and I absently wondered if chaos was dead out there. My unspoken question was answered a moment later, as those blue-green eyes of the platinum-haired young man pierced through the darkness of space surrounding them, shining out to grasp my attention. The surrounding stars paled in comparison, and I felt light-headed for a moment, my sensors malfunctioning as, in the next instant, those eyes had moved from amongst the stars, to but a mere inch from my own.

How had he done that?

My mind was, for lack of a better word, reeling. I had a thousand and one questions, damaged sensors, and a malfunctioning emotional inhibitor. This was not my day.

chaos, still very close to me, I noticed, looked very serious. He wasn't angry that I had seen him perform such unthinkable actions without aid of nanomachine or else wise, but rather, the young man looked like he was searching for something—something hidden in the depths of my eyes, no doubt.

A moment passed, both of us standing completely still while environmental bugs (read: nanomachines) jutted around us, disturbing air which would have otherwise remained unmoved.

chaos slowly smiled," We should get to the bridge."

I studied his smile, my expression set in stone; this wasn't the same, fake, smile that chaos usually used around everyone, including myself. No—this smile was a true smile; a little amused, a little happy, and…a little dark.

chaos leaned back from me, and began heading for the exit of the park, pausing once to look back and meet my eyes," Shall we go, Canaan?"

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Author's Conclusion: The next chapter is longer, I swear. ; At least it is on paper. For those of you familiar with the ending, I'm changing it. After the appearance of that large structure (Abel's Ark), no one did a thing about it. I, however, am taking author-istic liberties in making everyone freak out about it. Stay tuned if you're interested. 


	3. Calling Your Name

**Ignotum per Ignotius**  
(A thing unknown by a thing more unknown)

A fanfic by AmethystGleam

* * *

Disclaimer: I don't own Xenosaga or its characters. 

Author's Rant: Do heed the _shounen-ai_ and _spoiler_ warnings from the 1st chapter. This is still the same fic. Rules still apply.

Please enjoy.

* * *

_Chapter 3: Calling Your Name_

It happened again.

chaos had shown a power uncharacteristic of human beings. And I hadn't said anything–I was no better than his friends.

After the awkward encounter, I'd followed chaos to the bridge, where he stood near KOS-MOS, and I leaned against the back wall, eyes locked unto the back of chaos's head. If he was planning to disappear again, I'd see it. I didn't particularly care, but the bridge itself, beyond chaos, KOS-MOS, and myself, was in disarray.

Rubedo was yelling up a storm, hands resting uneasily on his guns. Shion and MOMO clutched each other in fear, while the cyborg was cracking his knuckles in deliberation. Mary and Shelly were torn between trying to calm down Rubedo, and calculating the time of impact with the immense structure that had appeared, which chaos helpfully chimed in and called 'Abel's Ark.' I grit my teeth when everyone accepted chaos's knowledge without question, before chaos glanced over his shoulder at me with the fake smile I was accustomed to. Irregardless of the smile, I kept my eyes on him, lips down-turned.

With a final cry, Rubedo stormed past both chaos and me, heading for the elevator. "I'm boarding an E.S.!" he cried, hands still resting on his guns. I proceeded to drown out the useless conversation that followed, still catching, out of the corner of my eye, the red-haired Rubedo being pulled away from the elevator by the pleading 100-series observational Realian prototype. chaos began to move now, turning to head for the elevator.

"Where are you going?" I inquired; lowering my voice so only he could hear.

"To the Elsa," he replied, continuing when I gave him a heavy look that stated my obvious need for more information, "We'll need to warm it up immediately at this rate, as I don't think Jr. has quite given up on examining that thing."

"You know something, don't you?" I retorted, feeling my jaw set. chaos simply smiled at me and disappeared down the elevator.

"FINE!" the 'little master's voice caught my attention after chaos was completely gone. "We'll all set out on the Elsa to get a closer look!" I rubbed my forehead. This was too much.

Within the hour, the Elsa was loaded and set for takeoff. Captain Matthews seemed more than hesitant about setting out, but the immense sum of his debt seemed to inspire him to cooperate. Hammer and Tony had, of course, protested as well, but after a few compliments from chaos, they both agreed to take on the mission. So there I was, on the bridge of the Elsa, standing in my normal spot behind Matthew's elevated chair. Launch went as smoothly as always, and we headed straight for Abel's Ark, in oppressive silence. It seemed the crew was alert (and sober) after their recent experiences in the Omega System. After approximately 5 minutes of idle flying passed, the uneventfulness reminded me that I should hook myself up to one of the computers and run a diagnostic check on my damaged sensors and malfunctioning emotional restraints.

The journey to B1, for the aforementioned purpose, was uneventful, but I ran into my former navigator at the entrance to the processing room(1); He was leaning in the doorway, almost as if he had been waiting for me. Seeing the empty room behind him furthered this thought, but I didn't care to ask where the robots who normally occupied the room had gone.

"I thought you might need some help," chaos began, shifting what little weight he had in his petite body off the wall and back unto his feet.

"With?" I quirked an eyebrow, not recalling having ever mentioned needing maintenance to the walking enigma in front of me.

"You want to scan your own system, right? You can't do anything more than auto maintenance aboard the Elsa, but you can find if there's a problem or not using the scanner here," chaos's voice was gentle, as always. The platinum-haired boy took a step backwards, into the room behind himself, and I followed, ignoring the fact that chaos quietly shut and locked the door behind us.

"We don't have a maintenance table in here, but you're welcome to lie on the floor if you'd like," the tone and expression of the young man across from me was nothing but sincerely apologetic.

I debated this for a moment; I was perfectly capable of standing during a checkup, but too many strange things had been happening as of late, and thus I figured I'd be better off lying on the floor than falling to it in a worst-case scenario. chaos waited until I had made myself as comfortable as possible on the cold metal floor before he crossed the room to the access a console. The familiar sound of keystrokes echoed in my mind before the pattern stopped, and chaos hesitated. One more keystroke, I recognized, and my personality layer would be disabled.

"Do you think Jin did something?" chaos asked, suddenly, glancing from the monitor in front of himself, down to me.

"When he was extracting the data from me in Labyrinthos, you mean? There's a possibility that he might have hit something by accident, but I don't see how that would cause the effects that are occurring right now," my answer was unhelpful, I'm sure, as chaos had probably been hoping for a 'yes' or 'no.' I felt sorry for not being able to give him a better answer, before letting a loud "tch" of frustration pass through my lips.

"Are you all right?" asked chaos, quickly, moving from his place at the console to come kneel by my side.

My eye twitched involuntarily. " My emotional inhibitor drive seems to be malfunctioning quite severely," I explained. "And my sensors have been haywire ever since you pulled your past disappearing act on the Durandal." Was this anger in my voice? "How can you do that, anyway? Why doesn't anyone ever ask why you say the things you do? Why doesn't anyone question your abilities? Just what ARE you, chaos?" I hadn't realized I was shouting until I took in the full look of shock on the platinum-haired boy's face.

"I...I'm terribly sorry," my apology, was, at best, pathetic, and I was so conflicted that I thought my OS might overload and shut down completely. Uneasy and embarrassed, I supposethe full range of emotions cascading about in my head like sparks of electricity scattered about when a bolt of lightning splinters apart–I moved to sit up, bringing my hand to my forehead. Before I could get my hand in place, I bumped noses with chaos, who had taken the time of my mental reflection to lean over me in curiosity.

"So this is what you're really like!" the shock had long since disappeared from chaos' face, it seemed, and his mood had taken a full 360. As opposed to being serious and concerned, those blue-green eyes were now lit up like a child's. I felt my face grow warm, and I recoiled, rubbing my lips where chaos' breath had danced upon them as he'd spoken.

"What are you so happy about? I'm malfunctioning! Can't you see that?"

chaos smiled good-naturedly," I fail to see the problem, Canaan. I never did understand why they put that emotional restraint on you, when the very act of living as yourself beats wildly against it." The young man's eyes closed for a moment," There's so much more to existing than following the orders of others. Besides that, sometimes it's better to watch than interfere… Though, the time for watching seems to be at an end. It's unfortunate, don't you think…?" As chaos's voice trailed off, his blue-green orbs reappeared to the world, and I stared at chaos heavily.

"What are you talking about?" I asked, seriously, eyes narrowing at chaos. This was the most I'd ever heard him say directly from his mind. Chaos's amused expression faded into something distant, which, now, snapped into an alarmed look.

"Nothing. Never mind," my former navigator rose to his feet and headed for the door, obviously shocked that he'd let his guard down for a moment, and hence divulged a fragment of a bigger picture, that I wasn't supposed to know about. Irregardless of his shock, I was not about to let chaos leave me so easily after saying something so mysterious.

Jumping to my feet, I threw myself forward without a second thought. chaos, having heard me rise, turned to me as I rushed towards him. Something amiss about the glow in those blue-green eyes startled me, and I took a bad step, gravity pulling me to the floor, and chaos along with me. After we'd both shared our respective expressions of pain, I noticed that chaos was under me, and reflexively, I leaned my weight up unto my hands; one of which was at the right side of chaos's head, the other at his left side.

"Are you all right?" I asked him, quietly, seeing no need to yell when we were so close together.

"I-I'm fine," chaos stammered, before shaking his head, as if to clear it. "And you?"

"I'm fine," while this was far from the truth, it seemed reflexive to say it was so. After a long moment of silence, I noticed that chaos's cheeks had begun to gain some red to them; I blinked once, not understanding the embarrassed look that had begun to creep over chaos's feminine features.

The next thing I knew, the room was bathed in red, and the shrill cry of an alarm reached my ears. Captain Matthew's voice came to us over the intercom: "We've got gnosis jumping in all around us! Everyone report to the bri–HOLY SHIT!"

The transmission's abrupt end seemed to have rattled chaos and me, both, as we exchanged similar looks of shock and horror. chaos seemed to recover faster than I did, though, and I saw his eyes go wide for a moment in realization; despite his frail appearance, chaos had more than enough strength to push me over, reversing our positions as he shielded me with his body. I felt all my breath knocked away at the sudden action, but before I could ask why chaos had done what he did, a gnosis came in through the floor where we had just been laying.

For a second, I felt dizzy, sensing a wave emission from the direction of the bridge. chaos must've realized this, too, as I saw him acknowledge the Hilbert Effect through the look on his face, and he reached forward the grasp the gnosis, before it could grab us.

My eyes widened.

In all due logic, chaos should've been undergoing whitening; but…no. Besides looking a little sad, chaos was fine. He pressed his hand harder against the gnosis and it vanished, no doubt defeated. chaos's head dropped immediately down to my shoulder after this display, his body limp on top of mine. I was too shocked from the display I'd just played witness to, that, in my shock, I wasn't able to check and see if chaos had fainted or not.

My shock was interrupted as I suddenly felt my entire body take chill.

Shuddering once, I soon realized that I was cold because chaos was, and he was lying on top of me, still. As I could feel the chill through chaos's bodysuit, and my own, I knew something had to be terribly wrong. I embraced chaos, tightly, hoping to give him what little heat my body could offer, and for lack of logic in the face of emotion, I began to cry his name, hoping he would open his eyes once more.

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Author's Conclusion: I wrote the first three chapters at all once over the course of a day without lunch. ; I was out at the time, and had no access to the game or the strategy guide, therefore I blame any misspellings and such on that. 3 

processing room(1) – I don't know a lot of techno babble, and it's been a few weeks since I did the GS campaign where you restore the memory of one of the robots. This is the room that's to the right of the elevator with the huge monitor in it. I gave it… other purposes, shall we say, for the purpose of this fic. -.-;

I apologize for the creepyness of chaos during this chapter, and the amusingly OOC antics of Canaan. ; Just…remember that his emotion inhibitor drive isn't working, and we'll be on good terms, yes? -.-;


	4. Logic versus Emotion

**Ignotum per Ignotius  
**(A thing unknown by a thing more unknown)

A fanfic by AmethystGleam

* * *

Disclaimer: I don't own Xenosaga or its characters. 

Author's Rant: Do heed the _shounen-ai_ and _spoiler_ warnings from the 1st chapter. This is still the same fic. Rules still apply.

Please enjoy.

* * *

_Chapter 4: Logic versus Emotion_

chaos had been out for a good five minutes now. I'd managed to regain control over my emotions, and despite the damage to my sensors from chaos's defiance of logic earlier, I was still able to sense a faint heartbeat from the man under me, but it was slowing at a rate of 5bpm every 3 minutes, due to the cold temperatures. For all intents and purposes, I was at a loss. Searching through my memory banks under directories of data and logic, I found very little that was of help to the situation. I wasn't supposed to move him, or leave him alone in his current condition, and yet, I had no way to get up and get him warm water or blankets, without breaking one of the formerly stated prerequisites.

The sound of a weapon being armed caught my attention, and I carefully flipped chaos under me, ready to shield him as he had earlier shielded me, sensing that the weapon I'd heard was aimed towards the door. With a loud crash, the door was blown clear off its hinges, and I glared up at the figure now standing in the doorway.

"Captain Matthews requires your and chaos's presences on the bridge, immediately," KOS-MOS stated, quite simply, her eyes fixed upon me and chaos. I tried to swallow my frustration as my bottom lip shuddered; chaos was getting colder.

"I can't go!" I told her, almost harshly. "chaos is freezing to death!"

"Very well," KOS-MOS replied, dully. "I will handle this situation. Please go on ahead."

"I won't leave chaos behind," I retorted, glancing down to chaos beneath me, noticing the result of the cold was finally starting to show on his face in strong tinges of blue and white.

"Please remove yourself from on top of him," the blue-haired android requested, moving from the doorway, finally. She came to stand by us, her look more impassive than anything I could ever muster. The way she stared down at us was almost degrading, but, hesitantly, I moved away from chaos, hoping that it was only my imagination that he had paled more at the action.

Just as I had stood, the Elsa gave a horrible lurch, and I cursed gravity as it attempted to overtake me a second time. Luckily, I was able to brace myself against the wall, wondering how heavy KOS-MOS must actually be to refrain from sliding even an inch across the floor at the sudden movement of the ship. Again, the red-eyed android came to look at me.

"Please report to the bridge immediately," she repeated, before glancing down at chaos. "I will handle this situation."

As utterly concerned for chaos as I was, there was nothing more that I could do for him, and I was getting a sinking feeling, not knowing what was going on outside.

These emotions are a pain in the ass.

"Take care of him, KOS-MOS," I ordered, lowly, exiting the room without looking back. Luckily, the elevator to the 1st floor was still working, and I headed from there to the bridge.

The scene on the bridge was a familiar one; Captain Matthews was yelling like crazy at Tony, who seemed to be the one responsible for the ship's sudden lurches with his 'impressive' (or so I've heard the others call it on occasion) piloting. Hammer's hands seemed at their limits as he pounded away on the keys at a frightful rate, but before I could take in anything further on the scene, I was addressed by Rubedo.

"Canaan! Where were you? Where's chaos?"

I smiled, suddenly, loving the twisted example of human nature that was now laid out before me. It seemed strongly to me that chaos's friends weren't friends at all; they clearly didn't care where chaos was until they needed him. Not wanting to make more problems for myself, I tried my hardest to stifle my emotions and to keep bitterness from soaking into my voice," He was attacked by a gnosis and was injured. KOS-MOS is attending to him right now."

"I'm all right," came a soft chuckle from my right, as the bridge doors opened to reveal chaos and KOS-MOS standing side by side. "Sorry I took so long, everyone." Chaos' humbleness never ceased to amaze me.

So chaos was okay. I sighed, breathing out relief into the otherwise tense air. The 100-series prototype saw me do so, unfortunately, as she quirked a look at me from her place at Shion's side.

No one questioned chaos's appearance, and I rolled my eyes. What was the point of wanting chaos present if you had nothing to say to him?

Another lurch shook the ship, and Captain Matthews let out a five-sentence curse at the pilot for his actions. The ship's movement had sent me sliding across the wall, my movement stopped by chaos, who caught me as he stayed on his feet, knees bent for balance. As the rest of the party started (or helped others) to get back on their feet, chaos took hold of my arm and straightened his knees, leaning against my shoulder as he pushed me back into a standing position.

I heard him whisper," Thank you for earlier."

The air of his words danced across my ear and I shivered before mumbling in return," I was just returning the favor." Closing his eyes, chaos gave me a cute—don't even ask why I called it _cute_—little smile before proceeding to aggravate me once again.

"It seems," he began, "That once we get too close to Abel's Ark, gnosis appear in order to defend it. Or, rather, gnosis are trying to flood into it, and when we get too close…"

"…The gnosis attacking are serving as cover for the other gnosis? Shit! When did they learn THAT!" Rubedo growled, casting a glare towards the gnosis hovering about outside.

"Why aren't they attacking anymore?" Shion inquired, blinking a little as a few gnosis floated by the ship, harmlessly.

"I backtracked a little when things got hot," Tony answered, leaning back against his seat so that he could tilt his head enough to look at the Vector Employee. "I guess we're not close enough to piss them off anymore."

MOMO looked worried and hesitantly joined in the conversation," I've never seen them act like this before…" Her eyes were fixed on Abel's Ark, in the background. "What IS that thing?"

"Jr.," chaos's voice rang out again; the voice is reason and influence," Considering we don't know what that thing is, and we don't have a safe way to get close to it right now, don't you think we should pull back for now, and study it from afar?"

Rubedo made a face, before shuffling his feet," Yeah, I guess. Let's head back to the Durandal for now."

"You heard him, Tony! Get us the hell out of here!" Captain Matthews exclaimed, and it was easy to hear the relief in his voice. My eyes flipped now to chaos, whose smile disappeared when I caught a glimpse of him. He headed for the doors, then, and I moved to follow, already knowing that no one else was going to notice chaos depart. He seemed to be disappearing more and more often, too… Why wouldn't anyone notice?

After exiting the bridge, I found chaos waiting for me at the first corner; He'd obviously expected me to follow him.

"If you knew about the gnosis appearing after a certain point, why didn't you try and stop Rubedo before?" I asked, casually, following chaos as he began to walk again.

"Jr. wouldn't have listened, and besides...it would have been too suspicious if I had mentioned something like that before even coming out here," chaos replied, his answer making my blood boil.

"You're not extremely suspicious as you are?" I groaned, rubbing my forehead as I followed chaos into his cabin.

When chaos went to close the door, I spoke up again," Don't lock it. If KOS-MOS breaks another door, I don't think Captain Matthews will be very happy." chaos's tired expression seemed to ease a little at my words, and he removed his hands from the lock with a smile.

"I suppose you're right," he laughed, quietly, before taking a seat on his bed.

"Are you all right?" I asked, kneeling in front of him in reflexive sympathy to the traces of exhaustion on his face.

chaos looked a little surprised by my reaction, as he had to blink once before speaking," I'm just a little tired. And how are you? You seem to be fairing well, despite your malfunctioning emotional inhibitor drive."

"You have no idea how much trouble you've given me in the last few hours," I scolded him, obviously annoyed.

chaos shook his head, apologizing with his eyes and his voice, both," I'm sorry. Has nothing good come out of this?"

I felt myself being pulled into those blue-green eyes and unconsciously, I think I leaned forward a little to project my voice as I lowered it," Nothing…good? What's good?"

chaos was silent for a moment, searching my eyes as intensely as I was searching his. Before I knew it, he had closed the little distance between us, and I felt his lips press against mine, shyly.

I felt like the world had stopped.

chaos's lips were soft, and slightly cold; I could feel both hesitation and gentleness in the caress of his lips.

So this was a kiss.

My first one.

I felt my face grow warm when chaos pulled back, and I saw that his face was slightly red, as well.

"Would you mind," chaos began, taking in a small breath to keep the words flowing, "if I lay down for a while?" My eyes were locked unto chaos's, and I almost expected him to say something further.

"I don't mind," I replied, resisting the urge to ask him why he'd just done what he had, or worse yet, the urge to ask him to do it again.

Just what is wrong with me?

I rose to my feet, watching chaos lean back against the bed and pull the covers up to his chin. The blush on his face, still prominent, contrasted sharply against the snow-white pillow that he had rested his head upon. He looked at me for a long moment before finally closing his eyes. I took this as my signal to leave, and turned my back to my former navigator, heading for the door.

His voice halted me once more.

"Canaan?" chaos whispered, "You're not mad at me, right?"

I blinked, my back still to him. What would chaos care if I was mad at him or not? My initial thought, besides the aforementioned, was this; why _should_ I be mad at him? Of course, I had my reasons to be disgruntled, but I simply found myself agitated with him because of those reasons—not angry. If there was some reason I was supposed to be angry with the platinum-haired boy, I would have liked him to tell me so himself, but I felt his eyes on my back, somehow, and turned to face them. Brilliant blue-green eyes, tuned down to a dim and pale hue, gazed at me; they were almost painful to look at.

"I'm not mad at you, chaos," I said, the simplicity of my words fighting against my better judgment. To my delight, however, chaos smiled at my words, his eyes returning to their former splendor, albeit with hints of tiredness reflected in them.

"Good Night, Canaan," he called to me, as I turned away again.

"It's 5 PM, chaos," I replied. "But rest well."

I believe I heard him laugh out a "Roger!" as I left the room.

* * *

Author's Conclusion: Has anyone else noticed that chaos has a way of manipulating people? And changing the subject whenever it's something he doesn't want to talk about? I wonder when Canaan's going to realize that chaos keeps avoiding all his questions. :3 

But yes. -.-; I apologize again for weirdness in this chapter. I think I got a little too giddy when writing about the kiss, so it's mostly just….spastic typing, Yes. I'm very sorry. Don't eat me.


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